Monday, August 9, 2010

Review: "My Bloody Valentine" Remake is the Bloody Bee's Knees

TRASH IN MY EYE No. 2 (of 2009) by Leroy Douresseaux

My Bloody Valentine 3D (2009)
Running time: 101 minutes (1 hour, 41 minutes)
MPAA – R for graphic brutal horror violence and grisly images throughout, some strong sexuality, graphic nudity and language
DIRECTOR: Patrick Lussier
WRITERS: Todd Farmer and Zane Smith (based upon the 1981 screenplay by John Beaird and 1981 story by Stephen Miller)
PRODUCER: Jack L. Murray
EDITORS: Cynthia Ludwig and Patrick Lussier


Starring: Jensen Ackles, Jaime King, Kerr Smith, Betsy Rue, Edi Gathegi, Tom Atkins, Kevin Tighe, Megan Boone, and Karen Baum

The 3D movie had a golden era in the 1950s, especially the mid-50s with such films as House of Wax (1953) and Creature from the Black Lagoon (1954). Another peak from 1980 to 1984 saw the release of films like Friday the 13th Part III (1982) and Jaws 3-D (1983). With the technological improvement in cameras and projectors, the 3D movie now has the popular RealD system. While RealD has been used prominently in computer animated films (Chicken Little, Meet the Robinsons), Lionsgate has used the process for its new film My Bloody Valentine 3D.

The story begins with a tragedy. There’s a cave in at the north side of the mine belonging to the Hanniger Mining Co., and only one man, Harry Warden, survives. After a year in a coma, Harry awakens on Valentine’s Day and unleashes a killing spree, a bloody massacre that takes the lives of 22 people. Tom Hanniger (Jensen Ackles), the boss’ son whose actions were responsible for the cave-in, barely survives Warden’s killing rampage.

Ten years later, Tom returns to his hometown in order to sell the mine. He discovers that his former girlfriend is now Sarah Palmer (Jamie King) and is married to the new Sheriff Alex Palmer (Kerr Smith). The townsfolk are not happy to see Tom, neither is his late father’s business partner, Ben Foley (Kevin Tighe), who doesn’t want the mine sold. They will all learn that they have bigger problems than old lovers, cheating spouses, and losing the mine. The killings have begun again. Has Harry Warden returned to take the heart out of Valentine’s Day?

My Bloody Valentine 3D is a remake of the 1981 Canadian slasher film, My Bloody Valentine. I’ve never seen the original movie [Since writing this review, I have seen the original - LD]; nor did I see the new movie in a theatre with RealD capabilities. Watching the movie in 2D, I was still able to identify many of the sequences in the film that were meant to take advantage of 3D to scare the audience, so I can’t consider myself deprived of anything. Even in 2D, My Bloody Valentine 3D had me frozen in my seat.

Director Patrick Lussier is known for his two decades as a film editor of movies and episodes of TV series. His previous directorial efforts, flicks like Dracula III: Legacy and White Noise 2, were straight-to-DVD efforts. His first theatrical feature, Dracula 2000, was pretty bad, and like many stylish horror flicks, it was laughable and cheesy. Lussier delivers the lovely guts of good horror flick, this time around. This film is scary and aggressive. My Bloody Valentine 3D goes after your ass. Lussier lets it all hang out, not afraid to show the killer’s pickaxe doing some gnarly digging in human heads and torsos. There’s even a fine sequence early in the film of a curvy, large-breasted, young woman running around completely naked except for her high heel shoes.

This is a return to the kind of slasher films of the late 1970s and early 1980s that offered a little gratuitous sex and four times the bloody mayhem. What about the acting in this movie? Well, it’s horror movie acting. What about the script? It focuses on creating scenes that are simply opportunities for graphic violence. One of the co-writers of this movie, Todd Farmer, even gets to play a small part, complete with a sex scene. No, this movie is not an insightful character drama, but it’s a blood chilling, senses-shattering horror flick. There is blood splatter throughout, with enough sangre to cover up the holes in the narrative. My Bloody Valentine 3D is a bloody good time, and Mr. Director, it’s all on you. Cheers!

6 of 10

Monday, January 19, 2009


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